Spiritual Drought

Have you ever been in the midst of what feels like a downward spiral?  I like to refer to that as a spiritual drought.  We should realize we are losing sight of God long before that happens but it's not until we're slipping downward that we notice we have neglected our relationship with Him.

When our happiness is fleeting and affected by those around us, it's time to take a look at what currently matters to us versus what should matter.  While it is true family should matter and be important to us, they shouldn't matter so much that our happiness is affected by them - or anyone else. God is our sustainer and He is the One in which we can find true joy.  We're hopefully going to spend an eternity with our Creator, what happens if we can't find joy with ONLY Him while we're here on earth?  I believe God created us to come together in marriage, have family and friendships because there are needs He "can't" gratify while we're here on the earth.  Someone to physically hug for example. Equally, there are essential needs we can only acquire through Christ.

I wrote something earlier that I had no intention of sharing with anyone but I think now, maybe I should...We all have inner demons we don't want to face or share with the world.. This is mine.

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I'm laying here listening to God's creatures, feeling the wind on my skin, and wondering how I got here. How did I become dependent on others for my happiness?
Life hasn't become any more difficult than it was when I was consistently happy.  It's me that has changed, I stopped letting God fill my heart with joy and became dependent on others. How do I get back to where I was? Where is the path that gets me where I want to be? I don't want to be one of those angry people.

God, I need you. I need your guidance and help with where I'm going wrong in my life. I feel as though I'm reaching a pivotal moment, I need to make a decision to change the direction I'm headed.
Please draw near to me as I draw near to you. Help me. I'm not even looking to change myself anymore at this time.  All I need to change is my perspective and my relationship with You and the rest will follow.
When I'm sad, angry, or discouraged, I want to turn to you. I want you to be the only One I need.
Are you still there?  I feel too far gone but I know the bible says you'll always take me back.
I don't know where to begin on how I can make you my sustainer, how my happiness can come from you and therefore within myself. I'm tired of "trying" to be closer to you. I want to just do it, but how?
How do I keep myself from getting discouraged when it doesn't happen in the timing I want?

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I wrote that this morning. A little earlier I read Klove's daily verse from several days ago and it's only now that I realize it's the answer I was looking for.
Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. Point out anything in me that offends you, and lead me along the path of everlasting life. - Psalm 139:23-24

I need God to show me what I'm doing wrong and what I can do right.  I don't need worry about it myself, God will tell me and He will help me do it in His time.

As I began writing this message a song came on KLove that I needed to hear. If I had a dollar for every time I felt that way - I would be drowning in money. The song is below.  It's genius, actually.  The relationship we have with God is like falling in love. It happens when you stop trying to force it to happen by consuming your thoughts on it and wondering "How?". It's simple. When/how does falling in love occur?  Unexpectedly and merely by spending time with someone getting to know who they are and what they stand for.  The difference is when you fall in love with God there is nothing else you need to be joyous. God is the only one we should depend on for happiness.

When we find it in God it isn't fleeting and it isn't affected by those around us.  The bottom line is we have spiritual needs that we sometimes look for our spouse or friends to fulfill. We will be sorely disappointed every time.  You think "If I only had a friend to talk to", "If my spouse only did this or that", or "If I HAD a spouse, THEN...then I would be happy". God intended for us to find happiness with Him and everything else is a bonus.

Get your heart right.